Sarcasm is a Pleasure

2012-01-26T20:56:00.002+08:00

Went out for dates and hangout with many girls before...
A particular situation strikes me the most...
Whenever they are texting with other people or busy picking/making calls, I would just let it be...
But the moment I am busy with my phone, they would start saying something like :-

Owh, busy with your phone larrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr?

Funny, so many girls, same situation, same respond...
What they have failed to realize, most of the time, I would put my phone on "Silent"...
I know a thing called "ethics" and "respect"...
The only time I would be busy with my phone during their presence is when it is really urgent matters that needed to be settled immediately, which is really rare...

Them?
Every single text or calls are important...
And the phone would always be in front of their eyes, not wanting to miss anything...

Amuse me with something new please...

Well, lets just take up the blame...
That is just the way girls are...

So, if I am the one with problem, maybe after all, I should learn how not to give a shit even more...
More matters would be less problematic then...
Lets pretend nothing is important...
Unless it is the matter of life and death...

2012-01-26T01:04:00.001+08:00

Super Suay Day where everything went wrong. I hate Wednesday.

One Liter Of Tears ` Remioromen - Kona Yuki

2012-01-24T20:13:00.000+08:00

Only a really inhumane person would not be touched by this series...

Ahhhhhhh, I miss it too! XDDDDD

Koizora (Sky of love)-Ai no uta Full Song

2012-01-24T18:36:00.001+08:00

I really really loved this movie...

Though the girl could have make a better effort...

Somehow, most of the good movies, it is the girl whom gave up on the dudes...

Even though they were (or still assholes), they would give the world for the girl...

So, Durex is right I guess...
Girl's cheat a lot more than guys...
Attention is something they really need constantly...

No wonder so many people become gay, they gave up on woman altogether...

I wish they would put this movie on cinema again though...

2012-01-24T01:57:00.002+08:00

Mei you Skype~~~ Wo yao kan ni~~~ Wo hen xiang ni~~~ Urgh!!!!!!!!!!

2012-01-23T05:27:00.002+08:00

Finally being able to came up with some rough idea, I had "LIGHTBULB!" moment (think about Gru from Despicable Me)...
I was happy with myself...
Till I lie down on my bed...
"Owh Fuck!"

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I really hate this kind of feeling...
Knowing how it all would turn up, I tried and tried to push it away...
If trouble shall come, it shall come...
But still...
"Owh Fuck!"

Ooops, the new Ikhwan should be less vulgar...

Thank you owh blog for keeping me sane...

My Chemical Romance - Sleep

2012-01-23T04:12:00.001+08:00

"Happy Chinese New Year to those whom celebrate it... It is better to spend this festive season getting drunk with your family rather than your friends; friends come and go but family bond remains forever... Smile always! :)"

A Chinese activist commented saying that it is either I am joking or I know Chinese people very well...

Not trying to over-state, I would say it is the latter...

I have intimately go into depth and submerge myself within modern Chinese lifestyle...

I stated "modern" as I am not well versed with how traditional Chinese would actually lead their life...

Actually this is quite useless post...

But I just had this need to write (type)...

Nothing heavy...

This is me being lazy...

Or just delaying my sleep...

I hate it when I don't feel like sleeping even though I know I should...

Goodnight to you...

Yes, you...

Have a safe journey...

And I hope you would have enough rest...

Cos you need to drive...

At any given nights, I will be alright with you going out...

But tonight?
You being sick...

You needing rest...

You needing energy to drive for hours...

Just not tonight...

Any other night, I would just feel sad seeing you off from Skype...

Tonight is more of worries and frustration...

2012-01-22T22:42:00.000+08:00

some ppl said guys have to pamper gals n fulfill wat they wan...
but how come no ppl said guys nid to be pampered too???....
some ppl said guys will change their attitutes after they get into a relationship...
but how come no ppl said gals oso change theirs too???...
guys nid love too... jz showing in other way round...
guys stil love u too... jz change their ways in loving u...
u r stil in my heart... though i might have change my way of loving u...
communication n repect r fundamentals in a relationship...
jz tell guys wats inside ur mind... n they'll try to fulfill it... jz dun let them guess...
Love is simple... jz as d same whn v both crash into each other at d 1st time...
P/s: don't ever try to compare the past with the present as you might also have changed...
just enjoy your moment with your sweet one and you'll find its really simple and contented...

Saw a Facebook status...
Touche'...

2012-01-22T12:13:00.002+08:00

Now that you have him, hold him, treasure him from day to day. It's so easy. –Nora (Pete’s Dragon)
Don't make people mad at you for too long, apologize. Don't make people guilt for too long, forgive.

2012-01-21T12:14:00.000+08:00

It is not being happy that make us feel grateful; being grateful that make us feel happy...

Gives You Hell (Full Narrative Version)

2012-01-20T08:27:00.001+08:00

Her text woke me up this morning...

Quite ironic considering she told me in her text that she is going to sleep as she just unable to stay awake long enough for me to wake up, hahaha...

I have waken up earlier but I just could not quite get myself up prior to that text....

All the drugs and chemicals from the medicine I took really caused my body to be rather weak...

The fact that I have not exercise for a few days also does not help...

icall

I immediately woke and went online to see if there's the slightest chance if me to catch her online but no luck...

It is time like this I wish my phone would magically reload itself...

As to this song, some people have always asked me, "What if one day your EXs or your enemies are richer than you?"

My answer have always been the same through and through...

Just let them be as it is their life...

I lead my life for satisfaction...

I just need those little bit of money to get the day by...

I just need those little bit of money to splurge my loved ones...

I just need those little bit of money...

Kinda problematic as we are living in a capitalist world...

But I'm idealistic with the touch of reality...

Meg & Dia - My Ugly Mouth

2012-01-20T01:49:00.001+08:00

Around 24 hours ago, she asked me to check my email...

We were on Skype, so it kinda made me confused on why would she send me an email...

When I open it, I was stunned...

Speechless...

Shocked...

For a full 5 minutes, I just did not know how to react...

No, it was not her naked picture, hahaha...

But it is like a report on how her day went on...

Her point of view on how her day went on...

The account of her feelings...

Every single of her words, I could just read it and hear her voice as if she is telling me directly...

And the best part, she stated that she would do it everyday till the day we meet again...

In actuality, it is something I thought of when Sabby (one of my EXs) started working...

As our time online together grew littler (she's in Singapore), and I was squeezing my brain on how to keep in touch with her when I go to the States (the time difference being the main problem), I managed to came up with a method...

I shall type a long detailed account on my activities for the day by sending her a message on Facebook before I go to bed...

I tried...

We tried...

But it did not last long as the crack in our relationship were really big by then...

We have reached the stage where the insecurities and the exhaustion were rather vast...

It failed...

So, when Jocelyn did that, I was stunned to the fact that another person could think of something similar...

Jocelyn have always opined that we were married for 100 years in our past life...

Due to so many things...

Again, this is not the post where I shall describe why...

The main thing is, this is such a pleasant surprise...

The 2nd email came in 3 hours ago...

Her voice came through...

I know you miss me...

Jocelyn, I am missing you more than ever...

I kept on asking myself, "Were we really married in our past life?"

Sexual Orientation

2012-01-18T18:15:00.002+08:00

I want an incisive, inquisitive, insightful, irreverent mind...

I want someone for whom philosophical discussion is foreplay...

I want someone who sometimes makes me go "Ouch!" due to their wit and evil sense of humor...

I want someone that I can reach out and touch randomly on an intellectual level...

I want someone I can cuddle with...

I decided all that means that I am Sapiosexual...

And I have found that girl who can finally satisfy my need...

2012-01-18T17:07:00.000+08:00

While I was driving around just now, one thing was on my mind :-

Jocelyn...
Jocelyn...
Jocelyn...

How she have hugged me yesterday by her car when we were at the airport...
How she would smile at me while looking up to me...
How she would kiss my lips while holding me tight...

And with her by my side, even if the world would end, I would not lie by saying everything will be alright...
But I am pretty sure both of us would be able to work things up and go through challenges together...
We are not perfect...
Nobody is perfect...
The key is to keep on trying to achieve perfection by accepting and fighting the challenges...
Through the good and the bad...
Through the laugh and tears...
Through the smiles and rage...
Through the pleasure and pain...

Would you be my dinosaur?

Loneliness is a Painful Poison

2012-01-18T14:11:00.000+08:00

Somehow, I always manage to draw lonely girls to me...
Some of the cases, it would develop into a relationship...
With me being the type that would only love to focus, it seems like both of us only in the world of our own...
She being lonely, me focusing just on her...
All is well...

Until we start to go our separate way...
She would start being occupied by something else, hence the change in the way she treats me...
While I would be this loyal dog waiting by the phone or the Instant Messenger to be at her service...
I can't help but using a scenario with one of my EXs...
So, I shall use it...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I started my classes...
I am busy...
But I check my phone every 5 minutes...
Or I would run as fast as I could to my room whenever I know she is online waiting for me...
I don't mind staying in my room for hours and hours...

Eventually, she started to make new friends...
And hangout with them...
Getting the attention of guys...
And a guy whom would ask her to cheat on me... (she didn't believe initially when I told her the guy was into her)
Long story short, everything changes...

So, I started wondering, whether remaining the same is a wise thing since she have changed...

Then, I started to explore myself on my passions and wanting...

And the next thing you know, she told me I have changed...
And the next thing you know, she told me I am giving her less attention...
And the next thing you know, she told me I am not understanding enough while she's working...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I will just try and blame myself on this one...
I should have just separate our life...
We are not married where 2 lives are united into one...
We are still two different lives...
The main thing is to keep each other...
To share the common ground...
To synchronize more and more....

And separating is something I have failed in the past...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My lover have just left for her Chinese New Year holiday yesterday..
For a month...
Something she has been looking forward to...
For her KK is nothing...
Boring...
Cos her hometown is KL...
The urban life...
Where people spend most of their time outside rather than inside...
Where people spend most of their time intoxicated rather than sober...
Where people spend most of their time filling their tummy...
It does get on my nerve knowing those things...
Especially considering most of her closest friends are of the opposite sex...
With 2 of them being her Ex...
(that still feels weird as I am the type that eventually cut off every contact with my Ex's and scandals to avoid old flame and problems)
I know this one month would be a true test to myself actually...
But the only thing I can do is to keep myself busy rather than waiting and waiting...
I should go and do things I want to do...
I will try my best...
But this gonna be a very long journey...
Something I don't quite cherish...

At times like this, I wish I can just feel casual about everything...
Not to care too much...
Not to love too much...
Not to want too much...

I am pretty sure I have learnt plenty from the past failed relationship...
Lets discover what I have learnt then...
I am gonna try...

My Baby You by Marc Anthony (with Lyrics)

2012-01-18T11:06:00.001+08:00

A bit too dramatic, a bit too early...

But hey Love, I'm still gonna dedicate this song just because of the emotions and the tone; never the lyrics...

Just like how I always listen to songs...

And just like how I have been loving you...

By listening to your emotions and tone... :)

2012-01-15T02:30:00.000+08:00

There were times when this particular girl would excitedly seek for me and tell her the story of how her day went by with every single detail from A to Z...
Till I realized something...
She has never actually asked "hows your day"...
Initially I refused to believe in that...
I would share my stories with her when we talk...
But one day, I decided to give it a test...
The night ends without she asking how my day went by...
The feeling sucks...

I love to express and share how my day went on especially things I am passionate about...
I would go on and on and on...
Till I realized something...
Things I am interested in does not necessary would be the interest of others...
So, it made me ask myself, "what is the point of sharing with someone whom did not care?"
The feeling sucks...

I remember every single crazy thing I would do when I am in love...
Being not financially sound does not help the cause...
But still, I just wanna try and make them happy...
Till I realized something...
At times, those financial matters are the things that would be the trigger to their happiness...
And could be the trigger to their sadness and envy and jealousy...
The feeling sucks...

"Don't ask, don't tell"
It sounds so nice, but yet unaccountable...
I think to myself, since she does it that way, I should do the same...
Till I realized something...
When you don't actually have to report, you tend to go corrupt due to the lack of control and supervision...
Just like money laundering...
And the last time I was not in any control, I wreak havoc everywhere I go...
Made me feels confused....
Should I treat like how I am being treated or just be the expressive guy I am...
The feeling sucks...

Girl's with emotional baggage...
I always thought those are heavy baggage...
They filled it in, they should be able to carry that on their own...
Till I realized something...
We humans would always have that baggage...
It is just the matter of whether the person carrying it and the content inside is worth it...
But my perceptions made them feel scared to let out their emotions...
Making me feel unimportant...
Seeing, listening and knowing they would rather tell their friend than me...
The feeling sucks...

"The One"
"Asshole"
"Soul mate"
"Fuck off"
"Best friend forever"
"Sarcastic Bastard"

Now now...
Being very skeptical, urgh...
The ability to analyze, urgh...

I do understands now why people whom are rarely exercise their minds are happier...
I do understands now why in an episode of House on why a genius intoxicate himself regularly just to feel happy...

Now, I just think, who the fuck am I thinking the way I think about myself and everybody else...
Till I realized something...
I rarely doubt myself...
And when I do...
The feeling sucks...

The feeling sucks...
The feeling sucks...
The feeling sucks...

Remaining for who I am?
Ironic how people as they are...
Come, knock me into a state of nothingness and let me be new...
Let me be normal in line of other rather than always being stuck in a fucked up view...

I just wish for once, there's a genuine answer...
I just wish for once, something elusive meant to exist...
Something unanswerable would answer itself...
I'm tired of being myself...

And I don't want to talk about this...
This post...
No matter who the hell you are that would by chance might be reading this...

Wait, the new Ikhwan should try to be more polite...

Simple nice and easy...

Some things are better left alone...

Till I realized something...
The feeling SUCKS!

2012-01-13T00:43:00.000+08:00

Every love song reminds me of you...
I love you Jocelyn :-)

2012-01-10T21:49:00.000+08:00

I know I am better and ready to be a father than being someone's husband...

2012-01-10T19:18:00.000+08:00

When you are not well or angry, it is better to keep quiet as every simple things become an annoyance and irritates you...
Things said would definitely not be a good one...
But life itself is an interesting matter; they love to challenge you at those vital moment when you are at your weakest/vulnerable condition...
Those moments define you as a character...
Urgh...
Still it would be nice to do away with all these physical inefficiency...

Death Premonition?

2012-01-09T13:05:00.000+08:00

They say when someone is about to die, they can feel it and they will know it...
They will start doing things they love the most before they die...
In a way, they are prepared to bid their physical body goodbye...

2 years back, I had very strong premonition...
During a certain period, all I can think off was death...
I could not stop shuddering...
But eventually it fades away...

Since the beginning of December, I have been having a series of weird dreams...
And just now, I fell asleep for less than 10 minutes when I had a dream...
I was resting at a balcony on a very high tower...
As I tried to walk away, somebody brings out a roll of big Iranian-style carpet to the balcony and accidentally hits my head...
I managed to hug the carpet but somehow my head feels dizzy...
I lean on the balcony while trying to retrieve my balance...
As I struggle, I felt like I am losing my consciousness and my leg is growing weak...
Tried to call for somebody but no voice came out...
Eventually, I lose my consciousness and *poof*, I woke up...

My late grandma used to tell me that if you fall down in Mecca while performing Hajj and you failed to stand back up, you would fail to wake up...
So, was that something similar?

Anyway, I do hope if I am about to die, at least there would be a very strong sign and indicator...
Nobody would ever truly be prepared but at least some things can be settled...
Nothing more I hate than promise unfulfilled...
Though, indicators through dreams shouldn't count as since I was small, my dreams have always been rather colorful and breath-taking...
A strong intuitions with a huge billboard would help~~~ XD

Shoe of Salvation

2012-01-09T10:50:00.000+08:00

Last night we had an argument...
And the words thrown, it hurts...
But it proves my point, I didn't enter this relationship blindly...
I confronted her and told her what and which words hurt me the most...

I still remember, in one of my past relationship, an Ex of mine said something very hurtful during what should be our first special moment together...
I didn't confront her on the spot...
I let it boil inside...
And eventually, it explodes...

As usual, I would let it known what kind of asshole I am and the things I'm capable of...
No fancy tricks as based on the past, eventually I will be the one needing to carry the emotional luggage caused by my actions...
I used my mind over and over again to analyze and defeat what my heart wants...
No more rushing...
No more forcing...
Because relationship, is just like a shoe...
If someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly...
No forcing, no struggling, no pain...
Freakily, same words uttered by one of my Ex, whom is a playgirl...
But there's truth in it...

Though, regarding the pain, it shouldn't be mistaken...
Everybody will hurt you, even your own parents...
It is just the matter of finding someone worth bearing the pain for...

Wedding Bells are Ringing

2012-01-08T14:14:00.000+08:00

Last week, a big news came to me; one of my good friend have secretly got engaged...
It put me in a spot as to whether I should congratulate him or not as it was his family's choice...
He said it is part of his family's tradition, which is why he did not care to date around during his college time...
One thing for sure, I just wished him all the best and asked him to tag me once the picture of the engagement have been uploaded to Facebook...

When people get into a relationship, at the heat of the moment, they just could not help but fast forwarding into the future...
There is nothing wrong with it but it tend to make you forget what really matters; the Present...
Can you really guarantee that you'd be able to survive the first few months itself?
Using the future as reasoning to end your present happiness, hmmmm, that is rather unwise...
Love will always find its way, somehow or rather...
A true one that is...

As for my current relationship?
She thinks we were married for a 100 years in our past life...
Why?
I shall keep that for another time...

я тебя люблю

2012-01-06T04:01:00.003+08:00

When I told my friend that my current girl is perfect, he said...

Yeah, that is what you say every time you get into a relationship...

Usually, the perfection that I have described about would be how our personality complements each other...
For this one, I am just saying she is perfect as a human being...
I would respect her even if she is my enemy...

She can dance and have performed... (even though she insists she can't dance)
She can sing well because she's a former national choir singer...
She is alright with badminton (though her laziness to run suits me well because I love to run) but I'm pretty sure she is a better swimmer than me...
Credit to her that even though she has skin problem which would arise when she do sports or goes under the sun, she would never back down from it...
In fact, never backing down is one of her stupid attributes, something I shall not dwell as it gives me headaches at times...
She possess good people and leadership skills as she has been the Head Girls (if I'm not mistaken) during high school and she was in charge with a few projects in her university...
She is even the Head Editor for her university's editorial...
She was once ranked third in the whole Malaysia for chess...
She was invited to join MENSA...
She knows how to cook and bake...
She is a chemical engineering student whom can play drums,guitar, piano and violin and recently got 4th place in a beauty pageant...
SHE EVEN KNOWS HOW TO RIDE A MOTORCYCLE! EVEN I DON'T KNOW THAT!
So, what is there not to respect about her?

Her personality?
Combining with mine?
BWAHAHAHAHA, NEVER PERFECTION...
Would produce something that goes by the name "Destruction"...

One thing for sure, I am deeply, logically and confusingly in love with this perfect girl...

The girl with a Panther's tattoo upon her shoulder...

Once Upon a Time

2012-01-05T20:37:00.000+08:00

Once upon a time, something happened to me... It was the sweetest thing could ever be... It was a fantasy, a dream come true... It was the day that I met YOU!

Hahaha, I wish that our first meeting were something magical like that...
The first time me and my love met?
Urgh...
Just urgh...

A Little Bit Unwell

2012-01-03T23:58:00.000+08:00

Suffering from a bad case of gastric at the moment and somehow it made my head dizzy...
But I just can't sleep because I've slept too much...
I feel like my brain is rotting...
And body depreciating...
Just like an old car in an old garage...
Urgh...

2012-01-02T03:03:00.002+08:00

It makes me feel so dumb and numb at times...

Frank Tan Kim How

2012-01-01T18:46:00.002+08:00

sorry, I'm really soriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii~~~

A Very Long Post Dedicated to 2011

2011-12-31T19:55:00.000+08:00

No way in hell I thought somebody would tell me she loves me at the end of this year...
And never in hell I thought somebody would be capable in pushing to the corner to make an ultimatum; to be with her or to remain as a friend...

2011...
It almost ends...
And I would safely say, it is the year I tone down everything...

Conferencing & Networking - I would only attend training or seminars when there is no other way out of it or when a good friend really wants me to be there; compared to last year where it would be done almost every week
Weight - I checked just now, my current weight is 72 kg, the highest number ever but in terms of my body, I would say I have started the year more of a fatty than how I would end it, fitter and more muscular. It would definitely be down to the futsal and my swimming training. No gym needed yo!
Temper - I pretty much short tempered but I have grew to learn, idiocy is something that can't be cured. There will always exist people whom make a big fuss out of small things or questions.
Partying - During my peak, for 2 weeks straight, one every 2 nights, hahaha. And now, I would only go if someone really wants me to be there for their sake; I won't be going around hunting for parties like how I used to. Ahhhhhhhh, I'm becoming old. But I do miss dancing in the club, definitely I do. Damn you Mr. Dancefloor!
Laziness - I am still very lazy but when it matters the most, I am quite surprised how I can actually push myself to do stuffs. No more Mr. Extremely Lazy, just Mr. Lazy.

As the year went on, many stuffs were said to and by me...

Here, I shall now list down the quotes that could safely define my year :-

You may need me in your life but do you really think I need you in my life?
I want to go to your heart
Even though I am having sex with him but it was you on my mind all along
I am really impressed by your performance and I here by inviting you again to be with us next week
Your work and effort have been outstanding and everybody in the office feels satisfied with your performance, would you please consider extending your stay with us for another month at least?
Hey, since your terms will be over soon, would you consider working at the other department please?
Asian by birth, Kopites by choice
No one is bigger than the club
Uncle, which one is your daughter?
Sleep is for the weak
I rather remain single than dating a loser
If everything can be solved by working hard, everybody would be a genius
Women whom argue logically does not exist
Your turning into him
If everything you said is the definition of Love, than it means I'm in love with you

Relationship wise, hahaha, this should be fun...
I started the year loving Sabrina...

Broke up...
Then, became a monster anddddddddddddddddddd bla bla bla, I am ending the year with a relationship...
A proper one, hahaha...

To be honest, I am really scared...

Unlike last time where it was all good vibes...

This one is full with bad vibes...

Every single path can go wrong...
Hahaha...
But one thing for sure, I don't want to lose her...

Just to prove how crazy this is, read the quote after this :

Mommy, do you want to meet my gf? If you want, I will bring her to the party tonight

HAPPY NEW YEAR! XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Coffee

2011-12-28T08:07:00.000+08:00

I thought adding some caffeine can put up the shock I needed into my system to clear up my mind...
Turned out it made it worst...
I need to revert back to my old routine; no caffeine from 12am - 12pm...
Meister Yadayada, YOU OUGHT TO KNOW BETTER!

Focus focus focus...
As time and time again, when I'm thinking with half of my mind, we all know what would happen...
How many times can I be lucky like a cockroach?
Yeah, cockroach may survive the comet and the big flood (if it actually happened) but they have insecticide nowadays...

Maybe the borrowed time is shorter than expected after all...

*shudder at the thought of it

I've been trying to avoid Panadol, heck I've avoided one since July when I was at my worst (for the year)...
But if by 12pm I'm still like this, I guess there's no other way...
Tried to sleep it off but couldn't...
Though "sleep is for the weak" (a quote from someone), I do need it...
Urgh...

Caffein, I've vomited you out but WHY DO YOU STILL LINGER?
T_T

Sinful Delight

2011-12-28T04:17:00.000+08:00

Once the gate is opened, it is very challenging to close it back...
After the sarcasm came out, it have been flowing...
And flowing...
And flowing..
My one month of effort down to the drain...

Sarcasm...
Insult...
Degradation...

So wonderful but yet I sound like a fool~~~

Lloyd - Dedication To My Ex (Miss That) ft. Andre 3000

2011-12-28T02:27:00.000+08:00

Such an awesome song but I never expect the lyrics to be "awesome" as well! XDDDDDD
Bad habit of mine in listening to a song; I would just concentrate on the sound and the beat of it and the lyrics would be heed upon some other time...

2011-12-28T01:24:00.000+08:00

Whenever I wake up in the middle of the night, it would promise a long train of thought due to the freshness of the mind...
But when your pounding head is the one whom woke you up rather than the normal wake up, I highly doubt so but lets try anyway...

The degree you tell people that you're gonna do would gives many effect on their reactions, topics they would discuss with you and how they shall behave around you...
If you tell them you're doing the Law degree, immediately people would touch politics and start complaining...
If you tell them you're doing the Psychology degree, they would be worrying that you're gonna read their minds and thought...

Though the misconception is fun to be observed, but Psychology is merely the scientific studies of human mind and its function...
It doesn't make a person a mind reader...
Studying Sociology and Anthropology would shift a person closer to that...
Behavioral Science would push them even closer...

Reading and analyzing a person is fun but once you're done with figuring it out, the fun fades away...
The only way you can perhaps derive some entertainment when they act beyond their normal behavior, occasionally...
Calculating everything from their backgrounds, past events, social interactions; every reasoning can be forked out eventually...
But it comes with experience to point things out accurately...

The so-called Women Instinct is merely their recognition of the absence of information that play with their fear...
But "Instinct" is a powerful tool for those whom hone it...
And my "Instinct" says I should stop this article right here...

Adios Senor & Senorita!

2011-12-27T12:04:00.002+08:00

I've made my move, I've showed my intention...
Take my challenge and I'll take yours...
Show me how much you want me... ;-)

2011-12-26T14:40:00.000+08:00

What is there not to like about someone that gives you the feeling of yourself?
The constant mind challenge and sneakiness...
Hey, we even talked about the theoretical physics regarding 4th dimension when we were drunk, WHO DOES THAT?

But I'm pretty sure if we decided to step it up another level, some of the things would change...
More expectation, more attachment...

Thinking and analyzing everything, I do want you...
Feeling with my heart, I just don't want you...
You are not ready on so many level...
So many things you are unable to feel or do...

So, where do we go from here?

2011-12-26T14:35:00.000+08:00

I've always thought my ability to pick up any sport was due to my father's gene..
Takraw, badminton, tennis, swimming, basketball, football, volleyball...

Turned out my mom actually has her fair share of contributions...
Tennis, bowling, ice skating, basketball and for the love of God, HOCKEY!
Really didn't expect the last one...
And she actually played saxophone last time!
She can pick up piano easily and not to mention guitar...
You never failed to surprise me superwoman!

Elvis Presley - Release me (1972)

2011-12-26T10:22:00.000+08:00

Will always love you Mommy :)

2011-12-24T21:37:00.000+08:00

The One

2011-12-24T20:22:00.001+08:00

My Little Princess, I could never be mad to her for long...
But she have made me realize my limit actually...
I can only tolerate people whom are not brattier than her...
Anyone whom is more spoiled than her, I would find them as annoyance...

So, the bar has been set...

Since my sister help around a lot in the house with the chores, any other than that is just unacceptable...
I do spoil her but that does not mean she is immune from my wrath when she is at wrong...

But the only leniency allowed would be my girl can be :-

a little bit fatter than her since finding someone whom as fit as her means I can only date an athlete :-S
shorter than her because the way things are going, she would be very tall

So, whoever that person in the future can;t be dumber, can't sing, can't dance, can't be a coward, can't be afraid of the sun and the list would go on and on...

Few more extra guidelines such as the ability and the guts to do bungee jumping...
For every so-called "weird" criteria, I have my own reasoning why...
And it is a calculated and psychological based...
For the bungee-jumping, I won't do it because I don't want to let my life depend on a mere rope...
I only believe my life is on my own hand as much as I could...
So, I need someone whom would have the guts when I don't...
As much as similarity is the key to a great relationship, complimentary attributes would be fundamental in prolonging it...

So many No-No's, I'm not scared anyway...
I rather remain single than dating losers or end up someone I won't be happy with...
I stand with my principle, marriage is a very sacred thing...
Not a mere back-up plan where you settle down because you are just lonely or just need offsprings...

ps: The One should definitely have no characteristics from this video below

http://sarcasmisapleasure.blogspot.com/2011/12/true-facts-about-girls-must-watch.html

DEV - In The Dark

2011-12-24T12:58:00.000+08:00

This is the only song that would perfectly describe how much I miss you...
But sadly, I think it is the cue for me to cut all the attachment...
Hmm...

2011-12-23T18:04:00.000+08:00

People would never understand this:

Greatness does not mean a single thing for me unless you reach perfection or the top...

EITHER I score a perfect score OR I am at the top of everything...

Why?

I am not allowed to feel happy or satisfied with those normal greatness...
Because it is just normal...

Who cares if you have such a high pointer if it is not 4.0.
Who cares if you score 8.0 for your IELTS if it's not 9.0.
Who cares if your percentage is good in class if you're not number 1 in class.
Even if you're number 1, if your percentage is less than 90%, in a way, it doesn't mean a thing.
Who cares if you are not fat because as long as you don't have an abs, you are still fat.
Who cares if you have represented Malaysia because the world havn't known you yet...

Shall I go on?
Who cares if I achieved all that despite the never-ending family instability, financial instability, psychotic EXs whom have crushed my souls during my most vital times, and my degenerating body which is still unresolved living on a borrowed time.

Who cares if I managed to charm so many people.
Making friends from drug dealers to CEOs.
Inspire people.
Respectful.
Humorous.
Passionate.

As the stuff that would be focused upon is my weaknesses and bad attitude.
Which at times, I did it due to unavoidable circumstances.

I'll always be known as the sarcastic, insensitive, lazy, snobbish asshole.

You wouldn't understand a single thing on why I carry this burden.
I am not that kind-hearted to carry this burden.
However, some things in life are meant to be done.
And only I am capable of doing it.

It is just, how could you possibly understand?
Impossible...
Because at the end of the day, you are just a normal person...

You maybe good at one point but I will always be better than you in many points...
I will always be capable of outdoing you, it is just the matter of whether I want it or not...

I havn't feel this low for such a long time...
Ya, I felt happy for a moment for getting 8.0...
But I guess that's never gonna be enough eh?
Even though I didn't attend a single class, even though I just did 2 hours of online training...
Owh, perhaps I should tell you all that...
And perhaps, I should tell you that I even sleep during the test itself...
Ya ya, perhaps with more effort, I could've got 9.0...

But because of you, effort doesn't actually matters...
Only the end-result matters...
Only for me that is...
Because for the rest, they are allowed to be dumb...
And stupid...

I fucking rest my case!!!

5 Ridiculous Things You Probably Believe About Islam

2011-12-19T12:24:00.000+08:00

http://www.cracked.com/article_18911_5-ridiculous-things-you-probably-believe-about-islam.html?wa_user1=2&wa_user2=Weird+World&wa_user3=article&wa_user4=recommended

I am not very much of a good muslim but this article is good...
Islamophobic is the new Anti-Semitic...

2011-12-17T19:12:00.001+08:00

I shall take every kind word I can get as the tonic to keep on going as it is rather rare...
But every time it comes, I would know how sincere it would be... :)

Sex and Singapore

2011-12-17T01:40:00.001+08:00

I was going through my daily rounds of reading the news when I saw an article of a 17 years old boy whom had sex with a 13 years old girl after knowing her for a week, on their first date...
It reminds me plenty of story from one of my Ex and her friends...
When it comes to sex, Singapore can be truthfully said have been Westernized way ahead of any Asean countries...
Attempted rape, molestation and many more can happen on the first date itself even though they barely know each other...
And plenty of this stuff have been hushed down as they wouldn't want their parents to know the hanky panky things...
Perhaps the statistics does not portray the real scenario after all...
Singapore is a very small island after all, news spread very fast...
With plenty of stabbings and dead body found this year, I wonder whether they are still the 2nd safest country in the world...

New Found Respect

2011-12-16T06:54:00.001+08:00

Yesterday's double training really changed my perspective...
My sister swim at least 5.5km a day and she still have the energy to do other stuff...
I just did a little and I rest a lot in between my sessions but my back and joints ache like hell last night...
It was so bad that I have to sleep on the floor to feel comfortable...
But it shall be worth it, I'm pretty sure...
My body feel fit...
It feels so easy to move and it feels so light...

On another account, I have asked her to teach me piano from the basic since she has proper training...
It was not that bad after all...
I have the fingers for it...
Just need to make it more fluid and flexible...
And more practice...

And reading the notes are quite easy...
Why the hell my Music teacher during high school made it all seems so challenging?
Pffft...

Enough blogging, time for another training...

Fly, Butterfly

2011-12-13T11:43:00.002+08:00

All this chlorine drinking shall be worth it in the end...
I'm getting there to master my Freestyle stroke, just need to cut down those calf and make em' stronger...
And when the Butterfly comes, I shall soar!!!!!!!!!!!!

Futsal Rant

2011-12-11T23:01:00.001+08:00

Today was a better futsal game from me and I was quite proud to the fact that my introduction to the game 2nd time around in a way changed the game...
And I managed to score a goal the way I always loved; via an outer screamer...
Slowly, I think I know how should I play, like Lucas Leiva...
But sadly, most of them wanted to take a break from futsal for a while...
Damn...

Tamil News Reader

2011-12-10T19:37:00.002+08:00

In the morning, it went pretty well but in the evening, I panicked a little...

I know I'm no good in dressing up but it seems whenever I suit up a little, people can barely recognize me...

Lucky

2011-12-10T01:21:00.002+08:00

Having plenty of close friends from all walk of life is good...
And now one of them have just made me feel better...
I'm more confident now...
:)

A Bit of a Rant

2011-12-09T22:36:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow is a very important day for me...
But the problem is, I've been exhausted the whole day...
Feel like sleeping early and prepare for it in the morning but, procrastination is never good...

And nowadays, my phone started to ring a lot...
SMS and phone calls...
I feel kinda weird, what's going on?
I've stopped my conferencing, training and volunteering and so on long time ago...
So, my phone should be all silent...
But the moment I wake up from my sleep or the moment I get back to my phone after swimming or something like that; there it is, plenty of messages and calls to be returned...

To be honest, I do miss those conferencing and networking and so on...
At one point, I couldn't even miss any calls or emails...
There were once I switched off my phone for a day as I was in Singapore and I didn't check my email at all...
It caused me to miss an invitation to be in a youth council chaired by the current PM and attended by former PM for multiracial and religion stuff; where only 30 youth from different organizations have been hand picked...
And I'm not even a leader of any organization at that point...
But it was all due to the bond and network I've created...

However, my current hiatus from all these stuff allows me to be closer with those whom have always been there around me but I fail to notice (busy going elsewhere every week) such as my ADP people (Steven and David doesn't count because we somehow would chill out at night) and my futsal people...
I got to know so many people inside the college whereas I used to have more friends outside than inside the college...
Occasionally I would be summoned by the College to attend stuff but the hiatus was good enough...

United Nations officer in Malaysia know me and gave me a work that rewarded me RM200 for just sharing a bit of my time and knowledge less than half an hour...
I can make money for fun...
Hell, a big media group was asked to approached me and their email was forwarded to me; but I am just not interested...
That's why recently JoEy questioned on why I have decided to be in this state...
I have plenty of reasoning and this post won't fit it...

Anywho, the main thing now is, I could see the progress of my Lil Princess with my own eyes and her excitement of hearing my voice cheering her with my loud voice which she could hear before she jumps into the water...
I love it when she shows that she really wants me to be there everytime she swims; even when it is just a normal practice...

As for my mom?
A mother would always be a mother but I've grew to love and appreciate her more as nowadays, I can see the logic behind her every decisions...
She's indeed someone who sees on a long term; even though luck is not quite on her side...
I'll do something about her luck, though magic is not an option, damn! XD

Looking to the future, I'm pretty much excited as slowly but surely, I can see where my story goes...
Yesterday, hahaha, it was a really gila day; I'm having a hard time believing some of the stuffs that have happened...
As for tomorrow, it shall be a good one I think...

True Facts About Girls (A MUST WATCH)

2011-12-07T10:46:00.000+08:00

Hahahaha, this is definitely video of the year...
Been there..
Every single thing in the video...
Deja vu man, deja vu~~~

Plain White T's - Hey There Delilah

2011-12-05T02:33:00.000+08:00

"A thousand miles seems pretty far but they've got planes and trains and cars, I'd walk to you if I had no other way"

The line above is definitely the favorite of many listeners of this song; me included...

I had a discussion with Tsing the other day...

When I'm in love, I became very obsessive and I treat that person as if she's the one I want to spend the rest of my life with...
For every relationships that ended, no matter how it started or what kind of person I end up with, it would take me a very long time to properly moved on...
For every heartbreak, I became wiser but none the stronger...
I would still love in an obsessive way but with different style; coming from the knowledge in the past...

Being young, I feel it is like a curse as I would be the one who came worst off every times...
But Tsing beg to differ...

She pointed out it is a gift; when The One finally came along, I'd be able to love her comfortably and truthfully with no holding back...
My efforts would not just be merely acknowledged, but would be appreciated and loved and paraded...
She would not say that she can handle my sarcasm, she'll just tackle it quietly along the way...
When The One comes along, I will know...
No rush as I'm very sure, she's searching for me too...

Till that time?
I will just keep on trying...
Two persons may be destined to fell in love but not to be together...
But hey, that's life... :)

Good Girl Gone Bad

2011-11-25T11:55:00.001+08:00

I was listening to the Lite.FM this morning on the way back from jogging and they were discussing a very interesting issue; "should your significant other have a best friend from the opposite gender"...

When you are in a relationship, you would face problems with your partner and you tend to go to your best friend for them to lend their ears and perhaps at times, advises...
One of the issues brought up was you tend to think something like "why can't he/she be more like my best friend"...
I do admit, I was guilty of that on few occasions...
But like they say, "the grass always seems greener on the other side"...
Only those in the relationship would know what's the good and bad side of their partner as a whole...
We may see that guy as a very generous guy whom always splurge on his girl but for all we know, that guy actually is emotionally weak and possess deep insecurity...
Or we may think that lady as a very mature and confident lady but she may turned to be a very bossy and arrogant person...

Last but not least, the insecurities rising from it...
Imagine your girlfriend going out and say "I'm gonna go out and get drunk with the girls" and the other being "I'm gonna go out and get drunk with the boys"...
It makes a whole lot of difference...
But in the world nowadays where homosexuality exist, we actually need to be careful on both gender...
Hahaha, kinda weird though but I know many people whom have lost their girl to another girl...
Damn!

Strawberry Taste Better Than Charcoal

2011-11-23T23:17:00.000+08:00

As I was waiting for my mother to arrive at the airport, I saw a really beautiful girl stepped out of a car...
"Damn, she's hot."
But the next 5 minutes destroyed everything...
Her friend offered her a cigarette and she took it...

Having experience dating smokers have taught me something; they can try to eat chewing gum or mouth freshener but the moment your lips locked, dang, it taste like charcoal!

That's why since that last girl, I've told myself, no matter what, a smoker is a no no...
I'll take lemon or strawberry flavor at any given day!!!

A Bulging Tummy is an Ugly Sight

2011-11-20T18:16:00.000+08:00

My sister is currently participating a swimming competition...
From being afraid of the water because she almost drown when she was really young, she have came into the reckoning to be a state swimmer within just a year when she started learning how to swim...
She was promoted from the beginner class to the intensive class just in 3 weeks...
And 8 months later, she was chosen for a state centralized-training...
My family still could not quite believe how rapid is her progress...

Yesterday, the first day of this national tournament; The President Cup was quite a miracle feat as she managed to be the best swimmer from Sabah for her age group...
However, today showed the real differences between those whom represent Sabah and her...

Her current coach have warned her and pleaded to her; do not take much rest during this holiday as there is 2 tournament in the January and one of the tournament is vital as it is where Sabah's representative will be chosen...

Backstroke aside, it is a known fact that she's the top 5 swimmer in the whole state...

I hope my mother would let her stay with me for the holiday in Sabah so that we can both train together; she can improve her physical strength and stamina for her swimming while I can do that for the sake of my futsal and maintaining my own body shape...

*finger crossed*

Happiness

2011-11-19T00:47:00.000+08:00

It was just yesterday, a girl was found hanged in her own room in my former college...
I was told it is due to frustration in love...
And many people, started lambasting her on Facebook by saying she is stupid for doing that, inconsiderate and many more...
Such an appalling sight that the society nowadays failed to respect the soul of the dead and show empathy...

Every person knows that a life, a soul is important...
And those whom are in their right mind knows that their actions could affect those whom care about her...

But what most people failed to grasp is that THERE MUST BE REASONS on why she committed suicide...
THERE MUST BE REASONS on why she was driven to such state where she did not care anymore...

"I shall never do such stupid thing"
It is easy to mutter those words...
But do we actually know what went on their mind?
What principles they hold and embrace?

Do we remember "Seppuku" or "Harakiri"?
It is an act reserved for Samurai last time where they take their own life by cutting their belly...
It is to maintain their honor rather than falling to the hand of the enemy...
For them, honor and pride is the way of life...
So, if who are we to say that such act is stupid?

Love does not make the world go round but love does make the journey worthwhile...
Family, friends and lovers are the thing that maybe priorities in life as they are very much the cause of our happiness and sorrow...
But do remember, no matter what, HAPPINESS IS IN OUR OWN HAND...
We can choose to be happy or to be sad...
For example, a man may let the buzzing noise of a mosquito annoy him till he cannot sleep at night while another man can sleep peacefully despite knowing people are at war and dying everywhere outside his house...
It is a matter of decision and choice...

So, choose wisely on how you want to pursue your own happiness...

Hey 2011

2011-11-17T04:17:00.000+08:00

I do realize what have happened and what became of me...
I have changed to some sort of a monster...
I know for a fact that most of my friends prefer the me whom are in love rather than the current me...
"Crazier" and more "monstrous"...
I myself not sure what's going on...

But reading back my old posts, I do realize one thing; I have failed to separate myself as an individual from the relationship...
I let the relationship define who I am...
And all of it got jumbled up and mixed up so much that once the relationship have ended, my life ended just like that...
Which is why I became a different person every time my relationships end...
It have managed to affect me so much that I have to withdraw from the world as it is...
Hell, why am I acting as if I got humiliated by the world?

Undeniably, I have learned and gotten wiser with every relationship...
By assessing each one, I can utilize the experience for the future...

I should not let some part of me just die out...

Hence, the decision of re-opening this particular blog...
Only this blog have the thrill to make me think...
Only this blog have the motivation for me to write again...

Hello once again to a brand new horizon... :)

ps: I wonder if there's any more people whom actually would read this

Walk Like an Egyptian

2011-02-06T04:22:00.001+08:00

The moment I saw my friend's Facebook shoutout, I went "Astaghfirullah Hal Azim" which means "I ask for Allah's forgiveness" in Arabic...
His father have just collapsed few hours earlier and was admitted into the emergency room...
Just last week, both his grandfather and grandmother was admitted into the hospital...
And next week, he needs to submit at least 2 assignments while his final year thesis also reaching the deadline next week...
After talking to him over the phone, I have realized what a really strong character he is when he even managed to tease me and joke with me...
He always stick to one principle, "Life is too short to spend it unhappy and too long to spend it alone"...

Which made me realize lots of things even more...

I am happy to the fact that Liverpool's new signing have scored on his debut...
I am happy to the fact that Manchester United have finally lost their unbeaten record...

And I have no intention to spend it alone...

I agreed mutually to break up with my girlfriend recently...
Within the first half an hour, I have realized, that is the biggest mistake I have ever committed...
Regret...
Misery...
Sorrow...
Those who know me acknowledge to the fact that "regret" does not exist in my dictionary...

One of my best mate kept on questioning the reasoning behind me agreeing to it...
He even said, "You can flaunt your ego around other people, just not with her..."

While google-ing for something, this article popped up...

http://www.bukisa.com/articles/137318_how-do-a-muslim-man-should-treat-his-muslim-wife

Even in my own legal religion, it teach how a man should treat his lover...
Soft and gentle...
Something which I have not been doing to my baby for such a long time...

There is no other way to do it but to try and get her back...
That is THE ONLY WAY!
If you really love somebody, you should prove it by actions, not all talks...
I should have learned from the history of someone whom is related to me, but I chose to ignore it...
When I have lost her, then only I learned to appreciate her...

That is indeed stupid...
History are meant to be learned from, not to be observed and heard open...
The ignorance of humanity towards history is the causation of the repetition in disasters and the crumble of dynasties...

Now you ain't around, baby I can't think
I shoulda put it down, shoulda got that ring
Cuz I can still feel it in the air
See her pretty face, run my fingers through her hair

Just a Dream - Nelly

Dead star shine, light up the sky
I'm all out of breath, my walls are closing in
Days go by, give me a sign
Come back to the end, the shepherd of the damned

I can feel you falling away
No longer the lost, no longer the same
And I can see you starting to break
I'll keep you alive if you show me the way
Forever and ever the scars will remain
I'm falling apart, leave me here forever in the dark

Daylight dies, blackout the sky
Does anyone care? Is anybody there?
Take this life, empty inside
I'm already dead, I'll rise to fall again

I can feel you falling away
No longer the lost, no longer the same
And I can see you starting to break
I'll keep you alive if you show me the way
Forever and ever the scars will remain
I'm falling apart, leave me here forever in the dark

God, help me, I've come undone
Out of the light of the sun
God, help me, I've come undone
Out of the light of the sun

I can feel you falling away
No longer the lost, no longer the same
And I can see you starting to break
I'll keep you alive if you show me the way
Forever and ever the scars will remain

Give me a sign
There's something buried in the words
Give me a sign
Your tears are adding to the flood

Just give me a sign
There's something buried in the words
Give me a sign
Your tears are adding to the flood

Just give me a sign
There's something buried in the words
Give me a sign
Your tears are adding to the flood

Forever and ever the scars will remain

Give Me a Sign - Breaking Benjamin

I put on both songs on repeat...
The second song, by Breaking Benjamin really portrays my situation...

It have been 4 days since I let you go...
I have become more hypocritical with every second that went by...
I shall not repeat the same mistake...
I shall not let go the only girl that have made me confess to her...
The only girl that managed to with-stand me for such a long time...
If you really love someone, you would go all out for that person...
Until you have nothing in you...

I will seek the answers for myself first...
Than I will seek you...
I love you...

When I come back, I will not be afraid to show to the whole world on how much I love you...
I will "Walk Like an Egyptian"...

Change

2010-12-06T02:17:00.001+08:00

How do you accept changes?
It is very painful, but you know it is inevitable...
Embracing the reality...
The reality affects you as well...
So?
You yourself need to change...

Or?
Do you stay true to yourself?
And find the new place that accept you for what you are?
Plenty of questions but yet not that easy to answer...

There is no right or wrong answer...
As long as you are happy...

I believe change is necessary for anything...
But it need to happen gradually...

When human don't care anymore, they tend to forget about the rest...
Some have fast rate, most have slower rate...
The result?
Pain...
Shock...
And horror...

Stereotypes

2010-11-29T05:53:00.000+08:00

"Hey Bro, do you have a lighter?"

+ I don't smoke

"How many girls have you fucked?"

+ I don't fuck around

"Do you know where to get the cheapest drug?"

+ I don't do drugs

"You managed to get an 'A'?"

+ I'm not that stupid

"I can't imagine you liking this kind of thing"

+ Yes, I love children, story book and cartoons

"Don't touch this thing, it is very expensive"

+ I have more money in my pocket than your salary

"You're very stubborn"

+ I was just trying a little bit harder than I should

It is quite tiring at times...
It is hard for people to take me seriously unless I dress up properly...
I look more like a thug than a geek...
It is even impossible for people to think better of me...
They would relate me more to negativity rather than positivity...
Being blonde, with spikey hair, flip flops, sitting at the back of the class, walking alone...
Hmmm...
What happened to the "don't judge a book by its cover"?
First impression...
Don't trust it...
Looks can be deceiving...

The Past

2010-11-29T05:37:00.000+08:00

It came to my attention that someone whom I knew was a homosexual in the past now with someone from the opposite sex...
I wonder, did that person told the partner about his/her past?
The past...

Sometimes, I'm not so sure what's my stand on it...
Should the past be revealed?
It would bring unnecessary hurt...
But the past is the one whom shaped the present...
And at times, the past can haunt the present...
Ignorance is bliss some would say...
But time reveals everything...

Focus?

2010-11-26T01:23:00.002+08:00

Just when it seems that things could not worsen, it did...
That what always happen as we would lose our focus...
Which would in turn create a chain of events...
Focus...
Focus...
Focus...

Facebook and The Wall

2010-11-22T00:55:00.000+08:00

Facebook...
It have evolved on how we humans interact...

Me setting up my profile to private...
Ahh...

I have even saw a person made a shoutout just to irk me on that matter...

The Wall...
It is no big deal...
The Wall is a big danger to me...
It made me crave for "Like"...
It made me crave for "Feedbacks"...
It made me crave for attention...

I love The Wall and I miss it as it is the place for me to try and spread my ideas and thought...
To spread and instill consciousness to the people in my network...
But at the price of my privacy?
I rather not...

People nowadays don't cherish privacy...
I do...
I cherish it so much...
Especially when you don't know whom you can actually trust within your netowrk...
Those whom observe silently to strike you down without you knowing it...

Most Malaysians don't realize it...
Not yet...
Hopefully they will someday...

Across Europe and North America, the danger that Facebook poses were felt...
That is why many people are pulling out of Facebook...

Stalkers...
Paedophiles...
Identity Thefts...
Scams....

Privacy...
It does not matter whose heart I will thread...
One thing for sure, I cherish my privacy...
Especially when I know I have enemies whom I'm not sure of...
Whom have hacked my accounts before...

Life as it is, without challenges, it is rather dull...

Whiner?
Take a knife and slit your wrist please...

To Choose or Not To Choose

2010-11-12T13:11:00.000+08:00

To choose not to choose is in fact choosing not to choose...
Whether to choose or not to choose is up to you as only you can choose to choose or choose not to choose...

My Philosophy lecturer made me realize something...

No matter what is the upbringing of someone or the circumstances that individual grew with, at the end of the day, it is the person whom control his/her conducts...

It is irrelevant to blame his/her childhood or upbringing to justify what is a universally immoral act as not wrong...

Think and ponder...

Think and ponder...

It is indeed, a great Food for Thought...

I've Never Expected All This But...

2010-11-11T05:00:00.000+08:00

I've never expected that one day, I would be so busy during my student life...

I have plenty of stuff to be done...

Plenty of place to be at...

Plenty of people to be deal with...

I could not even separate myself from Internet...

I could not even switch off my phone...

The last time I switched off my phone for 24 hours and did not check my email for 24 hours, I have missed the chance to attend a conference which the list of speakers consist of Koh Tsu Koon, Dr. M and our current Prime Minister...
It was the chance to be among a group of 50 youths from all over Malaysia...

At times, I need to sacrifice my sleeping time for pressing matters...

At times, I need to sacrifice my money for my public transport...

At times, I need to sacrifice my own feelings for others...

I've never expected all this but one thing for sure, I'm loving it...

Now, I have abundance of things to go to and place to be with that I need to reject some of it...

It is weird...

I've never expected all this but one thing for sure, I'm loving it...

I've met with Karpal Singh few days back...

He even gave his business card...

I've never expected all this but one thing for sure, I'm loving it...

At what cost though?

My Happiness

2010-11-05T21:22:00.000+08:00

PRESS THIS

I would definitely be proud to have a wife like that...
Beautiful, elegant and most importantly, shows plenty of interest in the husband's passion...
I was watching the match and I saw how our new owner and his wife behaved...
When Liverpool was down, they look gloomy but when Liverpool scored, they jumped from their seats all cheering and clapping looking so happy...
Coming for America, they are not accustomed to Football, only to their own version of American Football...
But after looking at their dedication so far, I'm very impressed...
YNWA!

Kindness of a Stranger

2010-11-05T01:43:00.000+08:00

On Wednesday, I've lost the keys to my room...
I was about to play tennis when I've found out I've lost it...
So, texted a friend for a favor to buy a new padlock, I figure I finish my tennis first and worry later...

Fast forward to 2 hours later, I was waiting in front of the Housemaster's house to ask for a spare key...
That is when a great thing happened...

Somebody called me...

I turned behind, and I saw that figure...

He's a person that I've talked to when I played futsal few weeks back...

After knowing my situation, he invited me to his room to chill while waiting for the Housemaster...
I refused as I'm still all dirty and smelly from my tennis session...
But he insisted with a smile...
I was stunned as some of my friends, they knew that I'm in that situation but yet they would just go along with their business...
Even I myself doubt I would do such thing...

Upon entering his room, he offered me dinner, something he bought during dinner...
I refused as I think it was kind enough for him to have me there in his room...
But he poured me a glass of 100Plus...

He was watching "Wanted"...
But when I said that I still havn't watch it, he immediately restart the movie again...
I went ------------------> O_O

When the Housemaster finally came back and I've managed to open my room, somebody came to see me...
It was him...
And he brought along the extra rice he offered to me initially and he insisted me to take it...
"I know you are tired after playing tennis and at least with this, you don't have to go out again to buy your dinner... I know you havn't eat yet..." was the sentences he said to me...
Coming all the way from the other block, I was touched again by his kindness...

We were merely strangers, someone who met upon a futsal game...
For me, this kind of kindness is just rare...
Very rare indeed when you're willing to go an extra mile for a stranger...

I guess, in this harsh world, there is still exist such a kindness...

All The Lovers Out There

2010-11-03T09:03:00.002+08:00

A good woman isn't concerned with her man's female friends & a good man doesn't give her a reason to be...

I Love Sweat

2010-10-28T21:51:00.001+08:00

Today, I have tried playing tennis...
And I love it...
Though, it is very exhausting indeed and it works out the whole body...
No wonder all the tennis players have nice body...
And no wonder tennis is the sport that burns calorie the most...

Tennis
Football
Futsal
Street Soccer
Basketball
Volleyball
Sepak Takraw
Dancing
Wall Climbing
Archery
Beach Soccer
Beach Volleyball
Swimming
Scuba Diving
Table Tennis
Badminton
Running
Netball
Cricket
Rounders/Softball
Handball

So, what else that I'm capable of doing but I still have not done it?
The game of Frisbee, I will be playing it soon enough...
The game of Rugby, will definitely play it before I fly to the States...
All those gymnastics routine, I am incapable of playing it...
Golf, I am not interested at all...
What else?
Hmmm...

Love and Marriage

2010-10-11T13:26:00.000+08:00

CLICK THIS

If you can view it, isn't it beautiful?
If you can't view it, try logging in into Facebook first...

Marriage, wow...
It is a fantastic thing...

A true romantic would perceive it as a once in a life time event...

A true sarcastic would perceive it as an over-rated glorifying event where some rake up fame, money and status plus people making fake smile and parents cries out of joy having finally get rid of their responsibilities...

A true Anthropologist would perceive it as a ritual that signifies the transitional period from single-dom...

Pinnacle of love...

Whatever it is, marriage is a very beautiful thing...

Last month, when I have sent my lover away at the airport, I came across these:-

If you don't know, that's a bunch of Mini Cooper from different time having a wedding parade...
I immediately stopped by the road side to snap a few pictures...
Being a Mini Cooper fan, it was extremely cool...

Wedding...
My wedding?
How would that be?
Hahaha...
It would go against the streotype...

I want it to be black...
So black, just like a black parade...
Just like a funeral...
Who cares about the taboo...
But that is of course my part...

Since I want to make it three occasions; mine, hers and ours, there would be plenty of spaces to be creative...
Money would be big though, hahaha...

But owh well, sometimes, in life, the things you wanted the most is the thing you are deprived off...

Searched for it, Searching for it...

2010-10-10T16:39:00.000+08:00

Hope you love it...

Can always say you don't like it...

And I don't mind searching for more till you would love it whole hearted-ly...

It can be very shiny just like you...

It is fragile just like you...

The silver portrays elegance, just like you...

The heart shape is a bit weird and awkward, the kind of heart you are receiving from me...

Can always say "No" to it and search for a new one till we find the right one for you....

Ouch, Really Ouch...

2010-10-10T16:31:00.000+08:00

The whole world is a very vast space but even both Heaven and Earth can't fit you in... Everyone is out there to kill you...

Detective Dee received this words which somehow sunk into my heart like how Atlantis sunk into the ocean...

Reading here and there...

Listening to people's stories and desires here and there...

Sharing a bit here and there asking for opinion...

Puzzle is completed...

Endless frustrations...

Endless rage...

Endless disappointment...

When you just can't fit in, do you try to fit in or remain true to yourself?

The pieces just doesn't fit anymore...

Losing in translation...

Well, a journey for a wandering soul is never-ending...

I thought I found it after I abstained from the world last year...

I guess I'm wrong...

The truth really hurts...

The key is to accept it and move on from it...

Ouch...

Really ouch...

That is Life

2010-10-05T02:33:00.000+08:00

As a youth, I could not escape from feeling invisible at times...
It feels like I can even rule the worlds...

However, it is always nice when reality hits back at you in the face really hard...

PANG!

A big blow...
Or even blows...
Coming when you least expected...

But it is good...
As it reminds you, that reality is such a harsh thing...
It reminds you who you are...
It reminds you where you stand...
It reminds you everything...

And life itself, is a beautiful adventure but yet a very harsh game...

Fellow Readers

2010-09-26T06:39:00.002+08:00

I'm exhausted even before my busy period starts...
Any idea on how to cure this exhausted mind and soul?

ps: holiday/vacation/day-off is not a good suggestion as I'm in one

Versus?

2010-09-26T06:33:00.000+08:00

The logic that you trust against the instinct which is wild, which one would you choose?

In judging and deciding for other people, I use my logic as assessment and observation serves better...
For myself, I choose instinct so that I know I have no regret...

I Wonder

2010-09-25T15:25:00.000+08:00

I wonder how Atlas bear the burden of the Heaven upon his shoulder when even challenges that burden my heart can be so heavy that it feel like squishing my tender heart...

I wonder how Eve could damned the whole humanity from the Paradise to the notoriety of the Earth when even I could not damn a sinful blood of mine...

I wonder how God can remain sane with all the never-ending whining from his devoted followers when even I could not keep pace with the cry of my soul...

I wonder...
I wonder...
And I shall keep not wondering...
As they may, or may not be, just a myth...

F & F

2010-09-24T04:57:00.002+08:00

Forgive and forget...
But how do you forget if you possess a good memory?

When you know it does not feel good...

2010-08-30T09:15:00.001+08:00

As time goes by, so slowly...
And time, can do so much...
:-)

When you know you are losing your sanity slowly but surely...
When you know you are losing your stability slowly but surely...
When you know you are losing your outstanding specialty slowly but surely...
It does not feel good...

When you know that neither actions or words can change a thing...
When you know that you can never express as some things are better off unsaid...
When you know that it is like a circle where it would go over and over again just like a bad record...
It does not feel good...

As time goes by, so slowly...
And time, can do so much...
:-)

Time will never lie...
As time would always tell...

???
Can't do much?
See how it goes and act accordingly...
As for now, smile...
Even if it is an agonizing smile...
Even if it is an ironical smile...
Even if it is a painful smile...
Smile...
Because you never know, who might like you for your smile...
:-)

Even...

When you know it does not feel good...
:-)

Life

2010-08-22T16:11:00.005+08:00

Let me tell you something you already know.

The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows.

It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.

You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit.

It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward.
How much you can take and keep moving forward.

That's how winning is done!

Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth.

But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody!

Cowards do that and that ain't you!

You're better than that!

- Rocky Balboa

Power and the Never-Ending Question

2010-08-21T15:34:00.000+08:00

Power corrupts, absolute power corrupts absolutely...
It shows how dangerous power is...
However, power is necessary to make changes...

But I've seen how power changed a weak geek thinking he is the next Hitler...
But I've seen how power make someone thirst for fame...
But I've seen how power feed someone's ego to grow fatter and fatter...
But I've seen how power blind people's eye on what is vital in life...

Envy is a very dangerous thing and it always come against someone in power...
When you have so many people going against you, that is the moment you know that you are moving above them...
Due to ego and pride, human tends to put down those more superior than them because they want to complement their own ego...
We humans are very self-centered in nature...

Due to circumstances, people in power can feel very lonely and very hopeless at times...
Paradoxical thinking does not help to suit with the surrounding norms...
However, people with power will always need to rely on themselves to bring themselves up because they could not afford to be down due to loneliness and could not afford to feel hopeless because they are the ray of hope to many...
It seems like a pathetic situation to be in but that is the burden of power because with "Greater power comes greater responsibilities"...
This quote from Spiderman may sounds like a cliche but it portrays the truth...

Ask yourself, are you born with power?
Or did you gain power via authority?

Power is the ability to get things done by mere influence...
Ask yourself again, do you have power?

Do I Have Any Muslim Reader?

2010-08-11T23:56:00.002+08:00

Happy Ramadhan Al-Mubarak...

The first day of Ramadhan went very well with me with no obvious effect...

I guess going through this phase of life where at times you would not be able to eat for days really managed to help in shaping me to be stronger and tougher...

I laud those non-muslim who would try and fast during the fasting month, you guys are fantastic! It was proven scientifically that fasting is beneficial to your health... For those muslim who don't even fast and/or keep on complaining/whining, shame on you as fasting is never an excuse...

Happy Ramadhan once again and I could not help wondering, how many muslim readers do I have?

:)

If I Have Kids One Day

2010-07-28T13:05:00.003+08:00

If I have kids one day,

My kids need to be genius as I would want them to be great in sports, martial arts and musics while maintaining an outstanding academics...

I would tell them that school is not the most important thing in life...

It is necessary but not vital...

Every teacher will preach as if their subject is the most important subject in life...

I will just tell them, "I want you to go to school not because of the qualifications or scholarships or grades but for you to gain knowledge and friends..."

If I have kids one day,

My kids would be allowed to search themselves what they like and passionate about in life...

No doubt I have ambitions for them...

I want lawyers, sportsmen/women, academicians and astronauts...

But I want them to seek and investigate their inner soul...

Do not be like me, who is only passionate about myself and football...

If I have kids one day,

I shall ensure that they would study Anthropology...

I want them to have better understanding on how to play the game of life...

Be skeptic...

Be sarcastic...

Be patriotic...

Race is irrelevant...

Nationhood is important...

If I have kids one day?

I would love to have kids one day...

Hopefully I would have a partner for that when the time comes...

Would not want to be an old man living with pets...

I hate pets...

Why bother taking care of animal when there is so many humans abandoned?

I look at all the lonely people out there...

Seeking for attention...

Trying to be different...

Trying to be loud...

Trying...

And keep on trying...

If I have kids one day...

I Want Nobody Nobody But Me

2010-07-20T02:41:00.000+08:00

I still remember, my first ever motivational talk was in the year 2000...
I would be sitting for my public exam that year, UPSR...
In one of the session, the speaker asked every body to scream with him at the top of their lung "Yes We Can!"
I looked left and right...
My friends, all of them screamed as loud as they can...
I did not feel like doing so...
And I did not do so...

A teacher of mine saw me...
Nudged my back and asked me to follow suit...
I nodded, raised my hand, but I did not mutter a single word...
My teacher could not see my disobedience as my back was facing her...

At that moment, I have decided something...
Only I myself can motivate me...
No matter what other people say, I would still be indifferent if I choose to...

Undeniably, they were plenty of tough times...
I was even consulted to go and meet psychiatrist...
But somehow, I managed to pull myself out of depression...

Yes, there is plenty of people who care for me...
Always there for me...
But I know, every person is responsible for his/her own happiness...

It is not god...
It is not parents...
It is not lover...
It is not friends...
It is we, ourselves...
We hold our own happiness...
We are in charge of our own happiness...
We...
We...
We...

Everything, starts with yourself...
Believe in yourself...
Know what is your worth...
And you shall be amazed on what you yourself can do...

It's So Funny Honey

2010-07-18T00:27:00.000+08:00

How funny it is when other people think it is funny even though you intended it as a serious request?

SARCASM IS A PLEASURE!

How funny it is when other people are made at you and the only think you can do is laugh to avoid yourself from abusing and asserting revenge?

SARCASM IS A PLEASURE!

How funny it is when you have no malice intention but yet it was interpreted as some sort of dark humor?

SARCASM IS A PLEASURE!

How funny it is when you care about someone out of the feeling of empathy and goodwill and it is being misinterpreted as a hidden agenda?

SARCASM IS A PLEASURE!

Hahaha...
Kinda interesting what capital letters, bold letters and striking colors can do to affect an article...
Well, all in all, my motto of life is...?

SAY WITH ME!

SARCASM IS A PLEASURE!!!

Frustrations in a Nutshell

2010-07-15T02:55:00.001+08:00

Being evil is a privilege...
Not everyone can achieve it totally as there is a compassionate side in everyone...

Destroying a broken heart is fun because it feels like stepping on a small ants which is helpless while destroying an iron-will heart is a challenge as their strength is basically their weaknesses...

However, if our heart is really broken, we would have been dead...
So, no point of complaining, right?

Not a matter of complaining, it is just a matter of sharing the inner thought...
No matter how useless it seems to be, somehow it lessen up the burden...
But, how do you know whether the listening ears are really interested to hear or really compassionate?

Humans are really selfish nature...
We love to hear only ourselves...
That is why everyone loves compliment...

However, what constitutes as a genuine compliment?
A sincere compliment may be thrown but it may be a counted as a mere sweet talk in order to flatter and pull the leg of the recipient...
A form of manipulation perhaps?

Well, human do manipulate each other...
Even the so-called "unconditional love" by the parents is some form of manipulation to satisfy self interest...

"I do good stuff because when I make other people happy, I am happy too"

Can you see how many "I"s in there?

All in all, life is just a game...
It depend on you how to play it right to survive till the end of the game...
Up to you to make yourself a worth remembering character...
A "cheat" is always exist but again, it is up to you to use it or not...

It is the eternal battle between good or evil...
What is good and what is evil?
It is a matter of perspective...

My perspective?
As long as you are happy but it comes with responsibilities...

The world is a lonely place...
And you would die alone eventually into a nothingness...
But hey, LIFE IS AN ADVENTURE!

:)
What does not kill you should only make you stronger...
Scars are not there to remind you the pain...
It is there to remind you that you manage to went through it...
Bad memories is never a mistake...
It is just a learning experience...

Life sucks...
Just suck it up and look forward with your chin up...
;-)

Cassadee Pope look blazing hot in the latest poster of "Hey Monday"...
When I receive my next allowance, I shall dye my hair to brown color...

A Confession of a Lone Wolf

2010-06-30T12:21:00.001+08:00

Right now I feel as if complete strangers, or people I hardly know say kinder things than the people who are my friends, or at least I thought they were?
Is it because the strangers see me from a different perspective?
Is it because the people who do know me, know me too well to pay me compliments?
Either way, one party is seeing something that the other does not...

------------------------------------------------

Found this from someone's tumblr...
This portrayed exactly what I have been trying so hard to express...
A simple "I Miss You" and "I Love You" would not hurts...
A car can crash out of nowhere...
A bomb can detonate just like that...
A knife can stab from the bleak of the night...
I guess this is why, I love to travel alone and meet strangers...
When you are tired of life, what do you do?
Just lie down till life come back to you...
"Creep" by Radiohead is a nice song to sing along...

I'm a Dreamer

2010-06-27T18:30:00.002+08:00

I'm a dreamer,
Just like Icarus, who wished to fly as high as possible to reach eternity...
Owh Sun, tho are cruel to melt my wing of hope...

I'm a dreamer,
Just like Medusa, who wished to be loved by Poseidon in every way possible...
Owh Athena, tho are cruel to crush my face of beauty...

I'm a dreamer,
Just like Achilles, who wished to seek revenge thus crush the bones of the enemies...
Owh Paris, tho are cruel to stomp my act of fury...

I'm a dreamer...
I'm a dreamer...
I'm a dreamer...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The movie "October Sky" would be perfect...
"I Have a Dream" sang by Westlife would have a rather joyful touch to this rather solemn note employed by me into this poem...

Penat

2010-06-27T06:04:00.002+08:00

Mentally exhausted?
What is the cure?

I guess it comes from the motivation of ones self...

Emotionally exhausted?
What is the cure?

I guess it comes from the the will-power of ones self...

Physically exhausted?
What is the cure?

I guess it comes from the quality rest of ones self...

Now...
HOW ABOUT ALL?

Does it drive you to the desolation and isolation of being pushed with your back against the wall at the corner of a dark room?

Or just shorten up the little adventure on this place called "Earth" in place of the elusive "White Light" that promised paradise?

Or maybe...

Just maybe...

Gave you the drive to rise above the occasion like how the turtle won the race against the rabbit with sheer determination and perseverance...

Maybe...

Just maybe...

You should ask yourself...

The best solution?

The vest of the best does not necessarily made from the very best material but was worn with the best of confident and the best of match...

Step behind...
Talk to a stranger about your problem...
Socialize with those whom are familiar but never close to you...
Self reflect...
Look into the mirror and smile at yourself... (make sure nobody is looking though)
And you will figure out eventually what is the best...

Why?
You know best what is your deepest inquisition and desire~~~ ;-)

----------------------------------------------------------------------

"My Sister's Keeper" would be relevant to this...
This movie is interesting as it revolve around "choices"...
The theme song with this post would be "The Kill" by 30 Seconds to Mars...

I Wish, The Fact and Some

2010-06-16T01:02:00.000+08:00

I wish stupidity can be cured...
But, can't do much...
The fact that lots of people don't travel meeting up new people says it all...
The fact that it is due to the genes inherited from their parents says it all...
The fact that most Asians dislike the Black People without understanding them says it all...
The fact that Facebook revolutionized people to be attention-seeking says it all...
The fact that...

That is life...
Each people have a role to play...
Each and every one of us...

Some may decide to seek knowledge...
Some may not...
Some may think ignorance is a bliss...
Some may think knowledge is power...

Conclusion?

THAT IS LIFE! :-)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Try and watch a movie called "Life is Beautiful"...

Anthropology's Anthem

2010-05-22T16:32:00.000+08:00

Taking Anthropology as one of my subject this semester is indeed a huge gamble...
But I know I need to take this gamble...
I need to grow up and push myself to the limit...
It was rumored that this subject is the toughest subject...

Last semester, I was very arrogant...
I took a few subjects with the thought of free A's...
Turned out that it is not an easy as I thought it would be...
Hence, it spelled doom and damnation...
My CGPA dropped...

Most college students would just be happy and contented with passing their subject...
Would that create the competitive spirit in me?
A definite NO...

Thus, I am more than ecstatic to see Zachary in the Anthropology class...
He entered our course last semester and rumored to have a brilliant academic prowess...
Understandably, he justified himself with the ambition to pursue Aerospace Engineering and the ability to speak in Russian language...
Though, the fact that I have never seen him anywhere else except for the class still disturbs me...

Thrilled (since I have never go head-to-head with him in a subject), I openly asked Benny and Avin to join this subject too...

Benny have the extra zeal in the manner that he have full controls of what he wants to do and achieve...
His 4.00 CGPA is not just for show...
He is the ideal student for every lecturer...
Owh, Benny is in the same batch with Zachary...

Avin is the guy whom would play DOTA with us till the wee hour and still bang an A...
He plays football with us, club with us and date with his sweet and lovely girlfriend till way past midnight...
In short, Avin have a great social life but still bang an A...

That is why, I am not being arrogant when I challenged them to enter this subject and fight it out...
I just wanna pit myself against these people whom I see have different strength that stands out...
I wanna bring out the best in me to rise to the challenge that they would provide...
I would not want to be contented with only an A...
I want to feel the joy of a challenge...
I wanna enjoy my every second of studying...
And definitely...

I WANNA ENJOY MY LIFE

Desire

2010-05-14T03:08:00.003+08:00

In this world, there is no one without desire...
Those who say "I Wish For Nothing" simply does not understand their inner heart...

--Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles

So, what is your desire then?
:-)

Trust

2010-05-08T17:33:00.001+08:00

People should be doubted...
Many people misunderstand this concept...
Doubting people is simply a part of trying to get to know them...

"Trust"...
The act is without a doubt a very noble one...
But you know, what many people do, that they call "trust", is actually giving up trying to understand others...
And that has nothing to do with "trust" but is rather "apathy"...
There are countless people out there fail to realize that apathy is a far more devastating then act than doubting others...
The true evil is becoming apathetic about other people...
They hadn't the slightest clue what they were doing...
Simply because they were trying to avoid picturing just how much pain they were inflicting on others by their actions, not giving it a single thought, a complete state of apathy...

Doubt them...
Question them...
And take a good look into their hearts...
Humans are the kind of beings that can't put their pain into words after all...

--Liar Game

Kitchen Affair

2010-05-06T20:23:00.000+08:00

I do not know what is going on with the world nowadays...
It seems that plenty of girls nowadays do not even know how to cook...
They would jokingly say "I know how to cook instant noodle" or "fry an egg" but hey, ain't funny at all...
Just have a look at the world's famous chef, most of them are guys!
Jamie Oliver...
Chef Wan Redzuan...
The dude from Hell's Kitchen...

The females answer?
"Just eat outside" or "we're too tired to cook" or "it's a hard work to do it"...
Where is the feminine side in you then?
You can give plenty of reasoning but hey, if you wanna impress a guy, the best way is always to impress him with your cooking...
Flaunting your beauty?
It shall depreciate with time...
Cooking?
It last for a life time...
If not, why do you think that we always love our own mother's cooking?

Moving On

2010-05-06T17:47:00.000+08:00

Regret is a powerful poison...

The more you harbor those thoughts, the harder it is to move on...

Take that part of your heart and throw it away...
Only concentrate on what you are able to do from here on...

---Psyren

Takoyaki, Pistachio and Friends

2010-05-01T15:35:00.003+08:00

I woke up so fresh from another weird dream...
I immediately went online to write about my dream...
I have been having weird dreams, so, no harm in sharing I guess...
However, a few things happened and the delays prolonged...
So, there it goes out of the window...

Right now, I am craving for Takoyaki...
At Singapore the other day, they have it but it is ham...
No thank you please...
Last night, the stall ran out of it...
Darn it...

Craving for Pistachio...
A friend of mine tricked me into opening my Pistachio stock which I have been saving during my good financial days...
He promised to buy for me the following day but he never did...
Screw it...
I really want Pistachio...
Lots of it...

Kinder Bueno...
Craving it...
When I was hanging out with Blushy aka Blushing Hippo, I have decided to buy Snickers as it have been a while...
It tasted heavenly!
Snickers is very yummy...
Still, Kinder Bueno...
Sigh...
Forget it...

There is 3 things that I am craving for even though I have never experienced it...
Haagen Dazs...
Ben & Jerry's...
And watching movie in 3D...
Haagen Dazs due to my A Level time where me and my friends would go the nearest gas station from our college during our break and just stand in front of it without having the balls to actually buy it...
Expensive...
Ben & Jerry's, my lover always wanted to bring me there but due to series of misfortune, now, that is just a dream...
3D movie...
Hmm, really have no luck...

But since today is Labour Day, I will have a break from any boundary or chain that refrain me from having and enjoying all of that...

So, Takoyaki,

Pistachio,

Kinder Bueno,

Haagen Dazs ,

Ben & Jerry's

and 3D movie,

I shall enjoy all of you before the month of June arrives!

Let It Be

2010-04-29T13:07:00.001+08:00

Expectation can lead to frustration...
Frustration towards life can transform into depression...
All of this happened due to lack of action...
Feels like a degradation, feels like no appreciation...
Owh well, just show some affection...
Let it be, it is part of infatuation...
The inclination sometimes encourage hibernation...
But taking everything into consideration,
Owh well, just another frustrating action...

Did You Know...

2010-04-29T03:46:00.003+08:00

Did you know when you dream about a person, that person went to sleep thinking of you?

Did you know when the person you like looks at you and then looks down, they’re crazy about you?

Did you know that when a person looks at you directly in the eyes they love you more than you think?

Did you know when that person looks at you a lot they can’t live without you?

Did you know when they leave, they say bye too much because they don’t want to let you go?

Did you know Sabby that I love you not blindly but logically?

Did you know Sabby that I love you not because of guilt or impulse but by a well-thought out merit?

Did you know Sabby that loving you is easy because you are so lovely even though you are always angry?

Did you know Sabby that I know I always make you angry but I'm too proud to admit it was me and I hate saying sorry?

Did you know Sabby I still think I'm not wrong but I say sorry because I want you to stay with me?

Did you know Sabby that I am very sleepy and I just wish you are here to be with me?

Goodnight Sabby...

And I'm missing you...

Yes Sabby...

It is me...

Yours truly,

Mr Maybe...

Hey Baby...

2010-04-29T03:31:00.000+08:00

The Colors of Our Life...

2010-04-27T18:42:00.000+08:00

In this globalizing world, everything is fast pace...

Money money money...

Fast food...

Fast career track...

EVERYTHING IS SUPER DUPER FAST!

Well, most of us have lost out on the important things in life...

When was the last time you hug your own mother?

When was the last time you gave a high five to your own brother?

When was the last time you kissed your own lover?

I just hope that if one day, I have my own kids, I would not depend on a nanny to raise them up...

I want to be there to see them grow...

They may reek and stink and the naughtiest creatures on earth not to mention one of the loudest and always restless BUT, they are definitely the colors of our life...

Every time I see them running around so care-free with no worries in their eyes, it made me feel so peaceful and at serenity...

Their laughter, their energy. IT IS WONDERFUL!

The most important thing is...

THEIR SMILE!

Keep on dreaming... Or maybe not!

2010-04-27T01:53:00.000+08:00

Just finished watching the movie...
Well, the love that Clare have for Henry is the kind of love that guys nowadays can only dream of...
She only crave and seek attention from the guy she loves...
Girls nowadays?
Mostly, just give her a little bit of extra attention and she will budge...
Clare was patience enough to wait for him even though he disappeared without any news or trace for 3 weeks on a Christmas eve...
I know a girl who dumped her boyfriend who could not keep in touch with her for 3 weeks just because he was out at another country for a family trip...
Her reasoning?

"I grew to live without you"
"He was not there when I need him the most"

Sometimes, it is not we do not want to be there...
We just could not be there...
We just need you girls to be independent when those time comes...

Well, that movie is definitely interesting and amazing to watch but it just feed the fantasies of guys out there...
Reality is definitely sad...
What a girl needs?

Cash, condominium, credit card, car, career and country club's membership...
Owh well...
Does not apply to all of the girls but definitely to most of the girls...